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1. What do you do if you find a snake in the toilet?
* Wait till he's finished.
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2. Where does a grizzly bear sit in the cinema?
*Anywhere he likes.
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3. Why are all elephants all wrinkly?
*Well, have you ever tried to iron one?
4. Which side of a monkey has the most hair?
*The outside.
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5. What has 50 legs but can't walk?
*Half a centipede.
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6. Why do cats lick their bottom?
*Well, no one else will do it for them.
7. Why do rabbits have fur coats?
*Because they'd look stupid in anoraks.
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8. Why does Tigger smell?
*He's always playing with Pooh.
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Doctor Doctor Jokes
1. Doctor doctor, my daughter is eight feet tall.
*Don't worry, she'll soon grow out of it.
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2. Doctor doctor, my eyesight is getting worse.
*You're right- this is the Post Office.
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3. Doctor doctor, will you give me something for my nose?
*No need- I already have one
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4. Doctor doctor, I'm suffering from amnesia.
*Just take two of these and you'll forget all about it
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5.Doctor doctor, I keep getting a pain in my eye when I drink tea.
*Try taking a spoon out.
6. Doctor doctor, I can't stop stealing things.
*Take this medicine, and if it doesn't work get me a iPad.
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7. Doctor doctor, I think I'm a piece of luggage.
*Yes, you're an interesting case.
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8. Doctor doctor, my son has a slice of pizza up his nose.
*Mmm, sounds like he's not eating properly.
9. Doctor doctor, I've just swallowed a mouth organ.
*It's a good job you don't play the piano.
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10. Doctor doctor, I've been stung by a wasp- shall I put some cream on it?
*There's no point- it'll be miles away by now.
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